1. I believe that every American should have to spend a year living in a third world country before embarking on a career.
2. I believe the lottery is a tax on the mathematically impaired. It follows, then, that it is immoral for the government to be in the business of raising funds by preying on this widespread human impairment.
3. I believe that Jesus Christ was the world's greatest psychologist, because we know that those who are living for a cause greater than themselves have the highest levels of satisfaction and mental health.
4. I believe that change begins with the individual. It follows, then, that micro-economics is more important that macro-economics.
5. I believe that one's religion is worked out through prayer, reading scripture, and in community. Therefore, any use of the radio and TV airwaves for religious broadcasts is pseudo-religion at best and should be banned.
6. I believe that the two-party system has the effect of unfairly stifling minority views.
7. I believe that baseball is the best game ever devised, when it is played on natural grass, without the DH, and with the umpires enforcing the rulebook as written.
8. I believe that learning to defer gratification is the chief sign of maturity.
9. I believe that Newton's third law applies to human relations. It follows, then, that violence is not an acceptable way to solve problems, as it simply begets more violence.
10. I believe that "Seinfeld" is the best TV series ever.
11. I believe in the importance of community.
12. I believe that health care is a basic human right. It follows, then, that all Americans should hang their heads in shame that the U.S., alone among developed countries, has no national health care system.
13. I believe in buying in bulk.
14. I believe that politics has no place in the Olympics. Jimmy Carter's boycott was therefore wrong.
15. I believe that people should think for themselves.
16. I believe that "shipping and handling charges" should be included in the (advertiserd) price of a product.
17. I believe in all-cotton clothes.
18. I believe that one should not have to "read between the lines" to figure out what someone is saying.
19. I believe in walking.
20. I believe there should be more coffee houses and more book stores.
21.I believe that inarticulate expression reflects muddled thinking.
22. I believe people are entitled to a private life.
23. I believe that between violent opposition and passive acquiescence there lies a third (and better) way.
24. I believe the world needs more people like Andy Rooney.
25. I believe that people should have to qualify for parenthood before becoming parents.
26. I believe in the beauty of a fresh snowfall.